There Is a Seat in Our Church for Ted Haggard

How many of you watched the HBO special, “The Trials of Ted Haggard”? Filmmaker Alexandra Pelosi, whose now infamous documentary “Friends of God” highlighted Haggard’s influence in the evangelical movement, revisited the former pastor of New Life Church in Colorado Springs after the spectacular and very public exposure of his secret life that involved sexual immorality and drug use. click here for the story.

Pelosi’s latest film follows Haggard, “exiled” from Colorado to Arizona, as he moves from home to home of kind “strangers” and attempts to find employment in the secular world. He is heartbreakingly unsuccessful and appears more bewildered than repentant about how he reached this low point. Although he is quick to acknowledge his wrongdoing, most of his confessions seem to be more lip service than brokenness about how sin has affected his family, devastated his former church and subjected the name of Jesus to ridicule. To give him the benefit of the doubt, however, much of his transparency in these areas may have been left on the cutting room floor. And Jesus is big enough to uphold his own reputation.

For me, the most telling point of the documentary was this quote: “The reason I kept my personal struggle a secret is because I feared that my friends would reject me, abandon me, and kick me out, and the church would exile and excommunicate me. That happened and more.”

That resonated with me. And he and I are likely not alone. I think one of the greatest failings of the Body of Christ during my generation is that we don’t live up to the lifestyles we advocate. Many of us live with secret sin because we don’t believe our church family will still love us if we tell the truth. And those of us who have had a taste of the respect and honor that accompanies ministry are reluctant to give that up by divulging the extent of our weakness in the struggle against sin.

Ted and I are very similar. We both war against the strongholds of pride and fear of man. Unlike Ted, thankfully, I’ve never had to face the fear of public exposure because, well, I don’t have a public. And I also am a member of a church that is a safe place to talk about secret sin.

My transparency has been more of process over the years than a one-time revelation. Over time, the Holy Spirit has prompted me what to reveal and to whom. Some of my sin is highly embarrassing. I don’t really want people to know such intimate details about me. I’ve discovered that instead of alienating people, though, my honesty has encouraged them to be honest right back. We confess our sins to each other and promise to become a place of prayer and accountability. Instead of rejection, I’ve found deeper relationship and realized that once the secret had lost its power, the sin habit was a lot easier to tame.

James 5:16 puts it this way: “[M]ake it your habit to confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you may be healed.”


So Ted, if you are reading this, please know that you are welcome at Metro Church to rub shoulders with the rest of us sinners. In fact, I’m saving you a seat.